one might say we're banned from that church
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
