hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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