Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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