Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Oh god it's open bar.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
