YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize