i need an iv and a liver transplant
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize