im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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