it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
