butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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