Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
