She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
