How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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