chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
