So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
