sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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