Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
