That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
