I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize
