Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
