that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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