Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
