can we get nightvision for the apartment?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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