I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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