i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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