Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
one might say we're banned from that church
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
