I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
