kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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