People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
4 words: hood of his car
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
