Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
