i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
