There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize