i think my tv is drunk
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
