She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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