So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
