can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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