you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
