theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I would fuck him just for his dog
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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