ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
no, he came in my armpit
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
