Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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