just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize