let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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