id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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