Got a toothbrush?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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