So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
