Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
