Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
