I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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