Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
