I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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