You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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